“Home is where the heart is.”
I haven’t been home in over a year and I just recently moved to Madrid from London. I have been living as an expat for a year now and before that moved from apartment to apartment, from city to city.
I haven’t felt “at home” since I left my childhood house at 18.
While I don’t know how long I’ll be in Madrid for, this move was very different for me. I got married to the love of my life and I am starting my own life, creating my own “home.”
But what exactly that means, I don’t know. I feel uprooted, chaotic.
I was inspired by the brilliant Caylee Grey to make an art journal in one sitting (check out her YouTube video here). The theme of home and being uprooted was the perfect theme for this journal.
I used a recycled journal from Hato Press in London that I was given by a friend. I kept the birthday wishes he wrote me in there, but wrote over them with my own journaling of how much I felt like I belonged in London.
The journal started out being dark and sad. It’s not America that I miss… it’s the West, the desert, the heat. I miss the sunsets, the mountains, the wild animals.
I also miss my mother’s garden, her little oasis in the middle of nowhere.
But the desert wasn’t enough for me. I needed to create my own path, be my own person. I still don’t know what path that is or where I am going. But now I have a new home that I can make into what I want. I have a home with someone who loves me but that doesn’t mean I have to forget my old home or my roots.
It is the desert and my past that have made me into who I am today and it is where I am from that will help me make my new life my own.